An Open Letter to People Who Write Open Letters

Dear Open Letter Writers,

Let me begin with a sarcastic introduction paragraph, or even just a few sarcastic sentences to let you know that I really like your thoughts on that particular subject. It’s great that the topic I’m writing this letter about is very open to public debate because the whole reason I’m writing this open letter in the first place is to attempt to get the public on my side of the issue. I want the public on my side, so in the paragraphs following this, I’m going to use many tactics to explain why my side of the issue is the side worth fighting for without even mentioning the other side. Doesn’t even matter what the issue is: wages, music, responses to letters about wages or music, responses to responses to letters about wages, or even responses to any of the above.

I sit at my desk, or a desk, in my university, which pays me zero dollars to be here, yet requests THOUSANDS of dollars from me each year. Notice how I capitalized all of the letters in the word “thousands”? It’s because I’m trying to make a very strong point about how annoyed I am that I have to pay money. Moving back to my original point, I sit at a desk, writing this, open letter in an attempt to jam-pack as much snark as I can into a few sentences before I remind myself that my high-horse isn’t actually that high and that I’m a pretty average guy who’s annoyed at something.

My reason for writing an open letter to open letter writers is at least twofold: I can’t scroll through my Medium timeline/front page/news reel/what have you without seeing at least one open letter every other day or so. Why make our cries of anger so public when all we really want is attention and someone to validate our more or less average situation? I will admit that there are people in very bad situations who feel like writing some sort of open letter, but often the option of doing such is subverted by a better option of just doing something about the issue, or removing oneself from the impact of the issue.

The other reason for writing an open letter to open letter writers, is to, as mentioned before, get the public on my side to enact change towards this glaring social issue. Gone are the days of closed letters, where communication was done individually and discretely. These days, these entitled millennials (of which I am one) get on a social platform (Medium, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Reddit, Yelp, Wordpress, Blogspot, Pinterest, Google+, YouTube, Email, the opinion columns in the local paper, a local farmer’s field in the form of crop circles, VK, MSN Messenger, Voat, and hundreds more) and post about whatever upsets them in some form of open letter in an attempt to sway the public to see their side. They often attack big issues that affect them, but they try to draw focus to the issue itself while still maintaining the “don’t forget about me” act.

In closing it’s hard to do initiate social change, and when an issue is brought about the right way, it can be powerful, and open letter writing is easily the most effective way to start a social revolution.

Michael “The Irony Is Not Lost” Holuj